summer 2008 is not one that will live on as a memorable summer. don't get me wrong, it has had it's memorable moments, but all-in-all, this summer isn't topping the charts in the life of emily. honestly, i can't wait for summer to end. i'm ready for my friends to come back to marsteller street. i'm ready for the school schedule (classes and pyg) to start.this summer is weird.
time after time i've tried to describe my feelings about this summer, and so far "weird" is all i can seem to come up with. one might ask, why emily, why is this summer so weird? which brings me to...
6 reasons why this summer is weird
one: for the first summer ever, i'm not living at home.
two: all of my closest friends are in other places, some pretty dang far away.
three: i'm only working 4 hours a day. in previous summers i've worked 8-hour days. 4 extra hours is a lot of time to kill. when i'm not busy or pushed for time, i seem to get very unmotivated.
four: i still haven't completely figured out why God wanted me here this summer because it's seems the very reason i thought He wanted me here is the very thing that has made my summer somewhat frustrating. which has led me to question...did God really want me here this summer, or did i just make a mistake and blow a whole summer?
five: i feel like i'm in a weird in between stage of my life. like i'm watching everyone else move on with their lives and i'm just hanging out in west lafayette.
six: i've pretty much been in a weird mood all summer. so many conflicting feelings. one day i'm confident and sure about something, the next day i'm skeptical and annoyed at the very same thing i thought i was sure of.
okay so now for the good part...6 reasons why it's been a great summer
one: i've been able to go home for some weekends and had a great time, but also see it's good for me to be living on my own.
two: i've gotten lots of quality time with Christen, who's only 50 min away and GREAT weekends with my other friends! and there's more of that to come!
three: since i don't go into work until 12:30, i've had awesome times in the morning for my study on the book of daniel. i've taken a couple hours at times to really dive into it and learn. i've loved it. i've also had the opportunity to spend mornings at lifecare.
four: even though there have been times of questioning why i'm here. i KNOW God has definitely been working and showing me so much about living righteously, heart issues that need major work, and really showing me who i am, what God desires for me (which has, by His grace, turned in to what i desire for my life).
five: even though my life is pretty consistent right now, i know my times of change will come in the future and i can enjoy these moments of peace to grow and prepare.
six: i've come to the conclusion all of the mixed emotions was me searching and it was and still is a frustrating process, but is so necessary.
rest assured, ask God to use your summer to stretch and grow you...He will.
4 comments:
and may i just add.... be careful what you pray for? By golly, He will answer! :)
Thanks so much for posting this, Em! It has been so encouraging to me to have another friend who is going through a similarly weird summer, even though we both know we are where we are supposed to be. (whether that be good 'ole marstellar street or classy monon) ;)
As you mentioned-- even though our summers are weird ones in several senses, we're probably learning and growing a whole lot more through the weirdness than either one of us would have through an "ideal" summer. That is such an encouraging thought to me!!
Well for the sake of this not becoming an email......I will see you, Miss Gutwein, at 7:30 am Saturday morning!
oh em...i love you.
thanks for sharing, i LOVE your painting! i can't wait to see it hung in our apt...how cool.
God works all things together for good...even this summer! I KNOW you are exactly where you are supposed to be...i've seen first hand God work in you this summer.
can't wait for this fall...you are one special gal. and this year will be anything but weird...it's going to be AWESOME MUY BIEN FUN.
Em, that painting looks really, really cool. Can't wait to see it. Love and miss you, Molly
you painted that? wowzers! muy bien! :)
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